IntrepidRD
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Country: United States
State: Oklahoma
Birthday: 5/30/1981
Gender: Male


Interests: Probably everything. If it's interesting. Funny how even boring things usually become more interesting when you learn more about them. Like tennis. Tennis is boring, but the more I learn, the . . . slightly less boring it is. I still don't like Wimbledon.
Expertise: I'm an expert in not sticking with anything for a period of time longer than 3 years. Usually, its shorter. One year down, two remain until I have to do something else. Only one left if I'm lucky


Message: message me


Member Since: 5/27/2003

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Friday, October 14, 2005

Currently Listening
Gasoline
By Theory of a Deadman
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The best way in the world to wake up is to a friendly female voice.  Things seem to be much better now.  I guess its a matter of perspective, you know?  "Do you like me? Yes.  Do I like you? Yes.  Do you want to be with someone else? No.  Do I? No... so what's the problem?"

Work is tiring me out and I'm not even taking calls this week.  I'm in training, like I said, and its getting really old.  Not that I'm anxious to take calls, but I usually work 3 10 hour days, 2 days off, 1 10 hour day, and another day off.  I'm doing 5 8 hour days at different hours than usual.  It's messing me all kinds of up.

Anyway, news flash:  Stillwater visit is in the works, perhaps as early as next weekend (not tomorrow, the one after it).  I had originally intended on doing something with my parents, they look like they're too busy, so that leaves me a 4 day weekend.  Possibilities abound, folks!


Thursday, October 13, 2005

Currently Reading
The Cat Who Walks Through Walls
By Robert A. Heinlein
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God, it's been ages since I made a personal post.  I feel like I need to, it's been a stressful night.  I'm going to get it all out, and if you all think I'm horrible for it, then so be it.  I'm not the same person I was in college.  My job sucks.  I don't mean that it's an awful job, I don't mean that I hate it.  As a matter of fact, I like it, and that's for some of the people I'm around and also because I'm good at it.  For those of you that don't know, I do advanced technical support for a major cellular phone company and my job is supposedly to fix peoples problems where it's concerned with computers and PDA devices, like palm pilots.  What I actually do with 80% of my working time is work that is far far beneath me.  There are 90 people in my group, there are 2000-3000 people in the country that do technical support at all, and 25,000 people who do customer service.  This puts me in the top 3% of the 10% of the company that does this kind of work.  Phenomenal isn't it?  And for my efforts, I do make a princely enough sum, at least by what the local standards are for someone who has no more official education than "some college" on his job application.  I'm one of those guys who organizes a skills-based resumes.  Not that I've filled one of those out in a while.

So currently, on the work side of things, I'm undergoing training for something that is once again beneath me because of the impression that any agent at my level should be able to handle any problem that comes his way.  I agree with this.  However, I also know based on experience that this simply means that I will be expected to bulwark against the unending flow of calls that the other 2500 technical support specialists aren't able to handle "in a timely manner".  Apparently the solution isn't to hire more menial technicians, it's to train the top few percent to do even more work.  The reasons I like my job are as follows:  there are other people like me who are actually way overqualified for the job but simply don't have pieces of paper to back up our worth, and two, because I fix people's problems and for some reason wholly unexpectedly, I like that.  I like being able to say, "Hah!  I kicked that thing's ass," and then have people be excited and in awe of my technical prowess.  This is probably why people work out.  I work out so that I get bigger muscles so my t-shirts look better and so that I'm even stronger.  I'm shallow like that.

My company pretends to listen to me, "You talked, we listened," is what they put up on trash cans and horrifically painted walls.  I know I sure was about to quit because of the trash can to person ratio was merely 1:3.  Whatever.  Some joker, and I think I know who (but it wasn't yours truly) put up a hand print on a marker board and decorated it as a turkey.  You remember when you did this in elementary school?  The legend next to the illustration was, "You talked, we listened.  You wanted hand turkeys."  That's all as much attention as they pay to us.  Not that management at the level directly above me has it any better, their cubicles are simply two of ours put together.  I can't say it makes them feel prestigious.

Let's talk cash a moment.  I, a highly trained technical support person in the top 0.3% of the company am paid $12.50 an hour.  Not bad for a HS Diploma being my last official certification.  Now, since my company outsources my job from the telephone company I "work for", this seems like a good deal to my actual employers.  After all, they charge the telco upwards of $30 per tech in my group, apparently based on seniority.  We never see this.  The guy who has been here 4 years likely makes less than mine as they suspended merit and cost of living raises quite a while ago.  Eventually, after half of those guys quit, they pay them equal pay to what I receive.  The telco, however, pays their customer service starting pay of $15 per hour with a department that serves as our overflow receiving between $18-24 dollars an hour.  Yeah, I feel valued.  Why do we have overflow?  Because they won't hire more techs to do the low level tech support.

You can see I'm frustrated with my job. 

My social life is on my computer and at my job.  I don't go out.  I don't like going out.  I went out with Anna and Bonnie and Kallina and BJ and Daniel because I wanted to see you guys.  I missed you, and it was fun to see how much  you girls have grown up from being the proper little freshmen that I met you as.  Anna especially loosened up, and Anna, I get along with you well because we both have to have time to ourselves and we have a social battery that just goes away and then we are no fun at all to be around.  I think you'll all remember I was out of my room a lot in college.  I didn't do as much homework as I should have, and I played a lot of Magic the Gathering.  I desk clerked, did student government, and basically was around people a lot.  I liked being around people like me, and even in government and work, I knew all the people before I even got into it.  It's hard to find people like me now.  I'm not a bar person.  I'm not a coffee house person.  You probably can't pick up girls too easily at the library, either.  So I did what anyone would do, when a guy from work told me about a "video game" called Second Life, I joined up.  Scripting, building, and people, though virtual.  It satisfied my social need for a while, especially as I met someone there who became very important to me.  She still is, and I care about her a lot.  I haven't ever met her in person, though I want to and soon.  We talk online a lot, we talk on the phone literally every night (though today is an exception and I'll get into that in a while) and we've used the web cam from time to time.  I feel like we have chemistry, but it's hard to tell that online, you know?  The bummer is that she lives in California.  To be honest, I find a long distance relationship easier and that makes me a coward.  I don't have to deal with being rejected as much because if they want to lose contact, they can, or it can just fall apart.  I can turn it on whenever I want, and if I don't want, then I don't sign in.  You can't do that in person. 

I miss all the good things about being there in person though, smell, touch, what someone looks like and tastes like.  I don't get to read facial expressions to know when I'm screwing up, though being on the phone a lot at work has done a lot to legitimize that as a method of communication for me.  I don't get do do things with her, at least things that aren't online.  I've found ways for us to watch the same movies, the same TV shows (of which I hardly ever watch TV, so that's a sacrifice on its own) because I want for there to be something for us to do to together, something to talk about.  She's as blue as you get in politics, and I'm a bloody purple color that looks like the opposite of whatever you hold it against.  We don't always get along in ideology, but she knows me.  Her parents are divorced and so are mine, we both love monogamy but hate the idea of marriage holding you into it.  We're strong willed and loners and introverts and have nebulous goals but still don't know what we want to do when we grow up.  I probably should find out soon, shouldn't I?  My goal was always to go back to college, but I don't know what I want to do, and as I'm footing the bill this time, I'm not going to waste time doing it.  I can't afford that.

I don't go over to anyone's house, I don't go out.  I go outside and look at the stars a lot, and I write stories.  I have a handful of short stories already, 20,000 words on one novella and going, 10,000 and 8000 on a couple of others.  I'm not satisfied with a single one of them, and I have no system, I just write and the story comes out.  That's why I have several in progress.  I entertain a notion of being a teacher because I find it romantic, and I've come to realize that I'm more idealistic and romantic than is probably good for me.  Right now I'm hurting because once upon a time where I worked, several months back, I thought I felt something for a girl I worked with.  I was involved with this girl from California at the time, just as I am now.  What I felt for the girl at work, however, was chemistry.  She was dating one of my friends and she didn't like people, but she stood close and paid attention when I talked, she made eye contact, she didn't shy away, and the day that she quit, she hugged me and a few of her friends.  I asked her once if she felt the chemistry between us, and she nodded.  I told her I wasn't ever going to act on it and she nodded her agreement too.  Chemistry isn't everything, but it's physical and it's tangible and I didn't tell the girl from California about it at the time because I was putting it away.  Recently, she had talked to a friend of her's that had a similar situation.  Girl meets boy online, boy tells all kinds of stories and lies, girl runs away cause guy is full of crap.  Now, I'd already made mistake one with this Cali girl because I'd told her that I had my own place and I live with my parents.  Stupid, but I wanted to look better in her eyes and how could she find out?  My guilt, that's how.  I wound up telling her.  Just like I wound up telling her about this chemistry thing, after the fact, because she knew of this girl at work and she teased me about her.  Feeling uncomfortable because of this other couple, I mentioned, when pressed, that I'd asked this girl at work how she felt.  The Cali girl pressured me today to go talk to this girl formerly from work and see if that feeling was still there.  She didn't want to feel like second place, and I understand even though I'd picked her once before because chemistry just isn't everything.  So I called this girl tonight.  She's a mess.  She had broken up with her boyfriend because he lied about loving her, saying it just because she wanted to hear it.  This happened at the same time she got a new car and a new job, so she's lost, hurt, medically depressed and tearing through alcohol and boys with abandon.  Needless to say, there wasn't anything there for me, and it was a long and bumpy telephone call with me trying to give her advice, suffering my own bruises and having nothing, such as work, to fill the awkward pauses or counteract the constant interruptions on both of our part.  So, feeling relieved, I tell my Cali girl that whatever chemistry there may have been, was now gone.  She wasn't exactly relieved.  In fact, I get the distinct impression that she's upset that I called this girl, even though she told me several times I should, and then asked several more if I would.  People have already told me I shouldn't have said shit to this girl about the other.  They also told me that the right answer was never to have called the girl from work, but I know this Californian, and she'd have thought some chemical ghost lived in my brain for all the rest of the time.  Well, I don't know about that, but it sure isn't there now.  As a matter of fact, I want to distance myself from these people because there's too much drama and I prefer my quiet world of long distance relationships and writing and reading and just being.

That's going to come to an end eventually, either by meeting someone (the girl from cali or as she fears, someone else) or losing my job or something.  The center doesn't hold, said the poet, and I know I need my own place eventually, though I'm just lazy and comfortable enough not to do it.  I've put it off for years now, feeling that I was quite disposable at my job.  I may be, but I've been disposable for 2 years now, I can always break lease if I have to.  I just live in mortal fear of debt.

So that's my happy life at the moment, frustrating job that I like from time to time, a girl that I care deeply for though she is halfway across the country, and very little flesh and blood interaction to speak of that isn't just a work formality.

I'm not unhappy with my life, though I want more.  That's part of why I write.  Do I want someone nearby?  Do I want friends?  Of course, but I want them to be people I like, not just someone who will do the job.

Sorry for having such a heavy downer of a post, but that's condensing about a year's worth of activity into a very brief post.  Looks like from there, doesn't it?


Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Jesus, since when did I become an Apple cultist?  I don't even own one yet. (But I will in '06 cause I'll never own Vista!)

First off, there aren't many feeds for this data, just a german site and best yet, the ars.irc.  The post is up here, my original notes are below.

There's a new iMac G5 out now, two of them.  The 17" model is 1.9ghz, 512mb 533mhz DDR2 SDRAM, 160gb SATA, iSight and Apple Remote built in.  The 20" model is 2.1ghz, 512mb 533mhz DDR2 SDRAM, 250gb SATA, iSight and Apple Remote built in.  Apple Remote is a small device about the size of an iPod shuffle that attaches to the side of the machine.  I can't tell if it's velcro, but it doesn't appear to actually slide into the frame.  It works with software called Front Row, which is of course standard with both new iMac G5s.  It can also be purchased for $29.00 and it's listed as being compatable with all the iPods as well, but you'll need it to be docked.  iSight is also built in, but appears to have a resolution of 640x480 which isn't great for a webcam, but its built in and it's the same as a normal iSight..  Photo Booth is new photo editing software for iSight.  It cleans up and distorts images, a cute app, but not really functional unless you're dying to have a fun house photo or want to be in black and white.  The awesome part of it is building in the ability to use iChat AV to every machine.  Not a Photoshop killer, but a NetMeeting killer.  The new computers run $1,299 and $1,699 respectively.  Now that the 20in isn't 2in thick, I want one.  I don't even want to wait for '06, but I think it might be silly to get one now and then have to use some translation software to run apps next year.

The new iPod... white and black of course, following the trend of the wildly successful iPod Nano.  And the Korean goverment wants a word with you about that... The iPod comes in 30gb and 60gb flavors.  The 30gb is only .43 inches thick, the 60gb is .55.  That's quite a bit thinner, I wonder if it's using flash memory.  It'd almost have to because you'll need more components for the brand new 2.5in display.  This new iPod has a resolution of 320x240 (QVGA) running h.264 (MPEG-4) and is capable of playing music, books, photos, podcasts (audio/video says Steve), home movies, music videos and whatever lands on the new iTunes. 

Speaking of a new iTunes, iTunes version 6 is out now, and a great many people can't even get to the download site at http://www.apple.com/itunes/download.  I did.  iTunes v6 has 4 new features.  First, gifting.  You're now able to give songs, videos, and playlists to other users, though they will have to verify through a confirmation email.  Second, you can now review music you've downloaded and other people will be able to use your reviews.  Pretty much like Amazon.  WWDC 05, Steve said that iTMS is one of the largest online stores in the world, and though the numbers are hard to come by, it looks like they're second only to Amazon.  Which explains the third, the automatic suggestion of music you might like based upon your ratings.  The fourth, of course, is video.  There are 2,000 music videos and 6 Pixar shorts available for download.  One video is approximately equal to 6 songs.  Oh, one more thing... wouldn't it be nice to watch television on your iPod?  Now you can. A deal with Disney and ABC has allowed iTMS (I wonder how long it will stay iTunes Music Store now that they do video...) to sell for the same price as the music videos and Pixar shorts, 5 television series.  Lost, Desperate Housewives, Nightstalker, That's So Raven, The Sweet Life of Jack and Cody are all available for download, the entire past season and new episodes are available the day after they're on television.  It all costs just $1.99.  Now true, the video is all caught up in DRM, and you can't burn it to cd, but since the new iPods have the same video connector as the iPod photo, and now that the iMac has a remote control, why would you bother?

Oh, and did you notice?  No more eMac.


iMac - Thinner and with built-in iSight.  Bigger HD (160/250gb SATA).
       Includes FrontRow, which is remote control/software
       suite.  The remote is about the size of the Shuffle actually.  1.9ghz/17in $1299, 2.1ghz/20in $1699.

iPod - 2.5in display, 320x240, MPEG-4 h.264 (Quicktime?)
       30gb 0.44in thick, 60gb 0.55in thick (30gb is 30% thinner
       than 20gb)
       Music, books, photos, podcasts (audio/video),
       home movies, music videos.

iTunes - iTunes version 6.  4 new things. 1) Gifting,
     2) Reviews, 3) Automatic Reccomendations,
     4) Video.  Gifting requires confirmation email on
     recipient's part.  Video can't be burned.  
     1 video = 6 songs. 2000 music videos available,
     6 pixar shorts, 5 TV series (Lost, Desperate
     Housewives, Nightstalker, That's So Raven, The
     Sweet Life of Jack and Cody). TV series available
     as soon as the day after it was aired.
     Videos are $1.99, but are DRM and can't be burned.


Tuesday, September 27, 2005

It may suprise you all to know that I do still get Xanga digests and just because I don't post, doesn't mean I'm not out here.  On the other hand, because I'm not active in the community, and due to duplication, I'm not tagging others.  I will quite happily respond though.

In no particular order, I present:

1. 21st Century Living - Matthew Good
2. On Your Porch - The Format
3. Homecoming - Green Day
4. Stars - Switchfoot
5. Thank You! - Home Made Kazoku


Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Something Fun to Do

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don't search around and look for the coolest book you can find. Do what's actually next to you.

Meanwhile, either as political exiles, or, lilke Ernesto, mearly eager to see Guatemala's "socialist" experiment first hand, hundreds of Latin American leftists had arrived in Guatemala, and their presence had lent a combustive element to Guatemala's hothouse atmosphere as the war of words between the Arbenz government and Eisenhower administration escalated fully.

From Che by Jon Lee Anderson



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